The American Awakening

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

If the so-called American Dream is a hyper-intentional motivation to give our children a greater financial future than we have now, at the expense of perpetuating the idea that higher net worth is necessary for higher self worth, I choose the American Awakening instead...

Amidst recent high school and college graduations, the observation of Fathers Day in America and the rising presence of political banter surrounding the US presidential election, I have seen and heard the phrase "American Dream" many times.

As parents and as stewards of the future of our country we have been fed the idea that our children must be better off than us; and the measuring stick for "better" is a financial one.  Anything less is a failure!  How can we live with ourselves if we leave our children with a country in worse economic condition than we found it?  But who or whom is talking about the mental, spiritual and physical well-being of our children, our country and our world?

"Paradoxically, what keeps the so-called consumer society going is the fact that trying to find yourself through things doesn't work: The ego satisfaction is short-lived and so you keep looking for more, keep buying, keep consuming." ~ Eckhart Tolle

The paradox is that this kind of thinking created the economic problems that exist around the globe today: 

• I don't have enough so I'll buy more. 
• When my things break, I won't fix them--I'll just throw them away and replace them with new ones. 
• I don't have any more money so I'll borrow more money to satisfy my wants.
• I'll never lose my job so I'll borrow as much as the bank will allow. 
• The bank executive thinks his or her institution will never run out of financial resources because home values will never fall and so they must take greater risk to lend more money to all the consumers hungry for it.

I'm not saying we shouldn't teach our children the value of money and how to provide for themselves financially, but I am saying that we fail our children and our future when we implicitly teach them that more is better and that one's identity is found in things--the clothes, the cars, the houses, and the lifestyle--that never seem to be "good enough."

"Stuff your eyes with wonder, live as if you'd drop dead in ten seconds. See the world.  It's more fantastic than any dream made or paid for in factories." ~ Ray Bradbury

The metaphor of "the dream" is useful for my point.  If this dream is the desired and preferred state, the only way to remain in it is to continue feeding it with more and better things.  How can I be happy with these old clothes?  What will people think if they see me in this junky car?  I'm not satisfied with who I am or where I am now.  Therefore I must be somebody or be somewhere else to be satisfied.  I am not successful if I do not appear successful.

All are lies.

In addition to the things, the destinations--escapes from reality--are crucial to remain in the American Dream state.  We live for the end of the work day, the weekend, the vacation and the retirement.  When a new day or new week begins, or when we return from the vacation, we say, "Well I guess it's back to reality now."  And so we must find another escape, another way to get back to the dream.

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle." ~ Steve Jobs, Stanford Commencement Speech, 2005

If the opposite of dreaming is awakening, we can all do ourselves, our friends, and our children a service by helping them awaken--to tell them and show them:

• Money is a powerful tool but not a destination;
• Things can be yours but you are not your things;
• Dwelling in the past or wishing for the future removes you from life; and
• Dreaming is healthy but dreams are not a place to stay.

There is nothing wrong with financial wealth but to make it one's highest goal (or to knowingly or unknowingly teach new generations to make it theirs) can actually make the American Dream more of a nightmare. 

Most of the wealthiest people in the world have said that they acquired their wealth by acting authentically--they were led by the desire to be who they are, not by the desire to accumulate massive wealth.  If the money followed their authentic behavior, so be it.  If they had a "dream" it did not remain a dream--it was transposed into reality by their actions. 

"One infinitesimal accomplishment in reality is worth a mountain of dreams." ~ Dorothea Brande

In different words, the most successful people did not constantly seek temporary states; they discovered (and were led by) their own traits.  They did not live to dream--they dreamed to live.   They were never Becoming but were always Being.

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Related:

The Knowing-Doing Gap

Defeating the 'Hobgoblin of Little Minds'

The Deconstruction of Social Conventions & The 'Unlearning Process'

Comments

[Ken Maynard]

Kent,

This is awesome. You summed up exactly how I think about society today... how I feel about money and the difference between the intent of "American Dream" and the twisted, abusive cultural destination that it has become.

Thanks for writing and posting this!

Ken M.

[Kent Thune]

Thanks, Ken. I'm sharing the quote you gave me for those readers that do not use social media:

The "American Dream" title was popularized by author and historian James Truslow Adams in his book "Epic of America," where he states:

"But there has been also the American dream, that dream of a land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for every man, with opportunity for each according to his ability or achievement... It is not a dream of motor cars and high wages merely, but a dream of social order in which each man and each woman shall be able to attain to the fullest stature of which they are innately capable, and be recognized by others for what they are, regardless of the fortuitous circumstances of birth or position."

"[The American dream] has been a dream of being able to grow to fullest development as man and woman, unhampered by the barriers which had slowly been erected in the older civilizations, unrepressed by social orders which had developed for the benefit of classes rather than for the simple human being of any and every class."

It's a crying shame that we have discarded the idea of the true American Dream and replaced it with expectation, greed, materialism and entitlement.

[kr]

Ditto "Australian Dream" in Australia where dream = home ownership.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_Dream

[Kent Thune]

kr: Thanks for adding depth this post by sharing a similar "dream" in Australia.

The dreams, which are really illusions, are truly a global phenomenon because humans identify with things outside of themselves.

I hope this great recession will change the way people think about money and materiality.

[Adam S.]

I think this is a brilliant, wonderfully put-together post. I've just stumbled on your blog, and I'm greatly enjoying your blend of common sense and financial "wisdom" (and after all, aren't they much the same?) Our over-consumerized, year-on-year-growth economy has fundamentally changed not just business but the average American individual, who now seeks happiness in the shoe or electronics aisle, rather than through personally rewarding accomplishments.

[Kent Thune]

Adam S: Thank you for the generous compliment.

Yes, wisdom is universal; it applies to all aspects of life.

The western world, especially America, is increasingly driven by the idea that "more is better." Almost all crises and world conflicts are rooted in discontent.

It is easy to lose oneself in the deafening noise of social media and handheld devices.

I hope to be a voice of reason that my help people become more aware -- to be conscious, to awaken -- from a false reality.

These are human challenges, existing for thousands of years. This is why I like to pepper my posts with quotes from hundreds or thousands of years prior. They still apply today, and often more so now than ever before.

Thanks for "tuning in..."

Kent